Part III: She Was Friendly to the Navy, But Rotten to 		the Corps

Part III: She Was Friendly to the Navy, But Rotten to the Corps

NARRATOR: Oh, there you are. Welcome to Episode Three of “Nuevo Malibu”, entitled “She Was Friendly to the Navy, But Rotten to the Corps”. “Nuevo Malibu” is sponsored by Sherm’s Worms. She Was Friendly To The Navy But Rotten To The Corps Want a herd of humus-churning red wrigglers to aerate your garden? How about some Canadian nightcrawlers for fish bait? Sherm’s got the worm for you. Now available in two varieties: bin-raised and free-range. Call 1-800-SLI-MEEE. (beat) Sherm’s Worms, a subsidiary of Doug’s Slugs. And we’re off. In our last episode, earthlings Clell Landis and Doctor Shay Watt? team up with Mack, the subliminal being that communicates through holograms. The trio and I, the Narrator, miniaturize our time-traveling Port-a-Potty the TURDIS, and meander through Donald Trump’s sundry brain lobes before adjourning to the Italian Renaissance for some pasta. After dinner, we stroll the streets of ancient Rome. Mack, who had transformed to Galileo to order our meal, slips into some one more comfortable — the form of John Nursall,  a reclusive scrimshaw artist. MACK: I understand that earthlings often like to attend a film after dining out. We could visit Planet Rom-Com in the Resort System. LANDIS: What’s that? MACK: An ongoing romantic comedy, Landis. You and the Doctor would be irresistibly drawn into the conventions of the genre: the meet cute, the inferior yet lovable  sidekicks, the triumph of true love over many obstacles. DOCTOR: Irresistibly? MACK: The atmosphere on Rom-Com overpowers earthlings. It wouldn’t affect me or Narrator. We could watch out for you AND serve the plot as your loyal  though not as attractive best friends. NARRATOR: I’m in....
Voyage to the Planet Romcom

Voyage to the Planet Romcom

In our last episode, earthlings Clell Landis and Doctor Shay Watt? team up with Mack, the subliminal being that communicates through holograms. The trio and I, the Narrator, miniaturize our time-traveling Port-a-Potty the TURDIS, and meander through Donald Trump’s sundry brain lobes before adjourning to the Italian Renaissance for some pasta. After dinner, we stroll the streets of ancient Rome. Mack, who had transformed to Galileo to order our meal, slips into some one more comfortable — the form of John Nursall, a reclusive scrimshaw artist. After dining out. we visit Planet Rom-Com in the Resort System. LANDIS: What’s that? MACK: An ongoing romantic comedy, Landis. You and the Doctor would be irresistibly drawn into the conventions of the genre: the meet cute, the inferior yet lovable sidekicks, the triumph of true love over many obstacles. DOCTOR: Irresistibly? MACK: The atmosphere on Rom-Com overpowers earthlings. It wouldn’t affect me or Narrator. We could watch out for you AND serve the plot as your loyal though not as attractive best friends. NARRATOR: I’m in. Tune in March 2 at 8:30 PM to see what happens Top photo credit: “If I can” by timcmak via Flickr (CC BY SA, 2.0...
Nuevo Malibu 2: A Different Version Of Trump’s Brain

Nuevo Malibu 2: A Different Version Of Trump’s Brain

Curious about Donald Trump’s inner thoughts? Wondering about what memories haunt him? Questioning why his right amygdala is so hostile? All these concerns are answered in Nuevo Malibu 2: A Different Version Of Trump’s Brain. Nuevo Malibu 2 - A Different Version of Trump’s Brain Written & Produced by Allen Perkins Having just transgendered a prepubescent Donald Trump in Episode 1, our intrepid trio jumps into the TURDIS, their time-traveling Port-a-Potty, and head to an alternate reality to study a different version of Trump’s brain. The two earthlings — world-weary Clell Landis and Doctor Shay Watt?, proctologist — continue to bond with Mack, the subliminal being from the planet Stephanie that communicates with them through holograms. They are joined by the Narrator, who becomes a sentient being when she comes aboard the TURDIS. Mack miniaturizes the TURDIS so they can get to The Donald’s brain through his nose.  The group pokes around Trump’s frontal lobe, looking for his Executive Functions: reasoning, self control, abstract thought . . . that sort of thing. All they find is danger from being zapped by axons from the synaptic process. The Narrator is severely stunned by one when Trump starts watching “Fox and Friends”. The crew moves on to the temporal lobe, where memory is stored. Using a device that Mack makes which looks like a Super Soaker, the Doctor provokes memories of Trumps’ childhood, all his marriages and Stormy Daniels. Having quite enough of that, the crew moves on to The Donald’s amygdalae, key to emotional responses. There they meet a little man who looks like a Picasso painting. He’s negotiating a peace between Trump’s right...
Port-a-Potty Time Trek To Nuevo Malibu

Port-a-Potty Time Trek To Nuevo Malibu

Wanna REALLY Get Away Wanna REALLY Get Away? See What The Future Holds? Think You’ve Heard Enough About The Donald? Come on Board For A Visit To Nuevo Malibu.  Join an intrepid trio of time travellers in the fantasy adventure “Nuevo Malibu” on Cortes Radio.  Clell Landis, a world-weary drifter, starts the cascade of events when he decides to leave the U.S. for a new country formed by British Columbia, Washington, Oregon, California and Tijuana, Mexico.  Nuevo Malibu is founded after Donald Trump accidentally nukes Prince Edward Island. Port-a-Potty Time Trek To Nuevo Malibu Nuevo Malibu - Written & Produced by Allen Perkins Come To Nuevo Malibu On CKTZ: Saturday, May 5 & 12: 8 PMMonday, May 7: 7 PMWednesday, May 9: 7 PM Join The Action Landis meets Doctor Shay Watt? when she lands a Port-a-Potty on his foot.  She had been using it at the Woodstock Music Festival half a century earlier when it whisked her away. The two set out to stop Trump’s rise to power, but instead end up on the planet Stephanie, where they meet Mack, a subliminal being who canmake anything and be anyone. The three careen around the universe a bit, including a stop on the planet Nuzzlepuss, where everyone speaks in Doctor Seuss lines.They end up in Trump’s closet on the eve of a crucial time in The Donald’s life.  They do, in fact, change history, but not the way they thought they would. Nuevo Malibu was written and produced by Allen Perkins. It was recorded on location in the universe, specifically Quadra Island at the Dave Blinzinger Studio.  It features the vocal talents of Kris Wellstein, Guy Holmes, Kornelia Mitchell,...